If Roxy Had Pooped 15 Seconds Later, We’d Both Be Dead Now



    You will never believe what just happened.  As I am posting this, maybe 20 minutes has elapsed since the entire thing went down.  It’s 5:56pm EST.

    Roxy and I were doing her afternoon walk; she poops, and we head towards the elevator. As soon as we get off of the elevator, we hear a screech, an explosion, and see a Ford Mustang flip horizontally in the air and slam into the tree you see below in the photos.  A black male jumps out of the car and runs away down the highway right by our neighborhood.  One of my neighbors runs after this man and grabs him swimming away in the canal by the apartment complex.  The driver of the car, also a black male, also jumps out of the car but is detained by the cop who was chasing this pair in a 25 mph zone and one of my other neighbors who was helping hold the offender down on the ground.  The cop runs after the first runner, but returns after he sees him jump into the canal.

    If Roxy had decided to have her constitutional 15 seconds later than she did, both of us would be dead.  D-E-A-D.  The car left the roadway and hit the grass causing them to tailspin across both lanes of the neighborhood road RIGHT where she took her shit.  I was interviewed by the police who told me that these guys stole a purse and an iPad from a Publix down the street, and were being chased.  The officer believed the car was also part of the theft.

    What the hell is wrong with people?!  I hope the driver enjoyed his f*cking concrete burns, there were kids playing on the other side of the street where the car impacted the tree.  THERE WERE KIDS PLAYING.  THIS IS A NEIGHBORHOOD.

    F*cking criminal bastards.

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    1. Hang them both, stealing and reckless driving in a residential neighborhood, we don’t need people like that in our society. Assholes, since you are both total pieces of shit, time to stop polluting our world with your presence.

    2. Jim, we discussed this a bit on twitter, but that’s a pretty terrible medium for discussing subtle ideas, especially when they’re about emotionally-charged events, so I wanted to write a bit more here.

      As I said on twitter, I’m really glad that you’re okay. I think you should reconsider your writing choice to mention the race of people when it’s not relevant to the story, I don’t think you had any malice in putting it there, for sure, but it’s one of those things that subtly perpetuates stereotypes. There’s no benefit for anyone to be on the lookout for anyone, because my understanding is that the suspects were apprehended, and simply calling them “black” isn’t very descriptive anyway. There’s little benefit to the story in describing them as “black”, since you don’t describe any other details of any appearance of them or anyone else — not the clothes, not the hair, etc. As I said, I don’t think you’re writing with any malice, it’s just easy to not think about why we describe people the way we do. The AP Stylebook was changed last year to reflect this sort of thinking, and you might be interested in this article: http://www.poynter.org/how-tos/newsgathering-storytelling/diversity-at-work/166506/ap-stylebook-updates-entry-on-racial-ids-in-news-stories/

      I’m sure some people will dismiss my concerns as “politically correct.” If that means that I like to think about how the use of language affects others, I embrace that label.

      Again, I’m really glad you’re okay.

    3. WOW! So glad to hear you & your baby are okay, Jim! Those images are terrifying, especially given that I recall you having a similar car at some point–so glad you weren’t behind the wheel of that.

      However, I have to agree with Kevin, here. The fact that there are other people who played large roles in this story, such as your neighbors and the police, but don’t provide any race (and sex) descriptors is a really harmful writing style. I understand that this was probably a TERRIFYING experience, and I know you didn’t mean anything malevolent by it, but these descriptions only fuel for those malevolent people, and furthers the role privilege in our society. I encourage you to reevaluate your descriptions, once this encounter is no longer as visceral.

      Again, seriously relieved you and everyone else involved are okay!

    4. Kevin, Daphne, I am grateful for your comments and opinions. It’s nice to see that you have your own opinions and can freely express them. Also, thanks for the well wishes, let me say that I am also glad I’m ok and alive!

      Here’s the thing: the two offenders were early 20’s black men. If they were white men, I would have said so. If they were Puerto Rican, Hispanic, Asian, Cuban, or purple with big orange fucking polka-dots, I would have said that, too. The people who were the helpers, rescuers? Unfortunately, they aren’t important in this situation. They never are, never will be, and it’s fact, watch the news tonight. The fact was that two black men committed a serious crime that could have resulted not only in MY death, my pet’s death, but the deaths of five little kids that were throwing around a beach ball in the parking lot just ten feet beyond where the palm tree stopped their stolen car. Why? Well, I guess you’ll have to ask them, but the fact remains that they did it, they were black offenders, and their actions and subsequent assault on the arresting officers was and will be unacceptable behavior. When the 911 operator asked me what color they were, she didn’t balk at the facts like you two did. It was factual information as they were the target of the operation that was in place when they lost control of the car that nearly caused five funerals, were it not for the strong palm standing in the way.

      Your comments make it seem like I am at fault for factually quoting their race, like I am some kind of bigot in the wrong for making pointing it out. I guess that’s your opinion, I recommend starting a website with your name on it where you can be as “politically correct” as you like. I certainly didn’t forecast them being black, I didn’t make some editorial comment on the FACT that they were black men, and none of the 21 black and 13 hispanic neighbors standing down there with me talking to the police had any problem calling their race out to the police. Are they wrong, too?

      We had some awesome discussions as a community watching this shit. One of my neighbors, Dario, said this: “It’s really pretty embarrassing around here when these punks give the rest of us black men a bad name by putting folks at risk. They should get jobs and goddamned contribute. Too late now, I’ll be paying MY goddamned tax dollars housing and feeding these punks. Shit man, I got a kid in grade school, I’d love to take him to Disney with that money.” Is Dario at fault, too? Another neighbor, Irene, a Hispanic woman (I’m unsure of her geographic origins) made a similar comment, but the gist was that “these black thugs make it hard to be safe anywhere.” She’s in the wrong too, right? President Obama calls himself a “black man” all the freaking time. Are you on his website calling him out? I sure hope so, if that’s how you feel.

      What it comes down to is this — thanks for your opinions. I highly recommend you start your own website that has your name on it, and is absolutely chock full of your own opinions like this one is of mine, and change the world. I’ve got tens of thousands of my own hours and equally as many of my own dollars invested in JIM On Light. If you don’t like what I put on here, I welcome your comments if you still decide to visit my website. If not? Fair winds and following seas to both of you.

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